Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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