Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
