dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
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