Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
