no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize