in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I am mentally ready for anal.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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