Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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