ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
