Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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