and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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