He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
did you just send me my own nude
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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