I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
