PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
