Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
