Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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