I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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