im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
