she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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