Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
