I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
