Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
