No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Randomize
