I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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