She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
