I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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