i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
