i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Randomize