I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Let's paint friendship bongs
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
