I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
The feeling are messing with the penis
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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