just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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