Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
