1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
the condom got lost in my hair
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
