He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Randomize