Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
