it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Barsexuality is the new black.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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