what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
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