I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
