So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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