The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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