it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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