So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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