Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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