if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I could fuck to npr.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
