Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
