Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I need moral support for this bender
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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