Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I need to align my fucking chakras
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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