Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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