it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
babies were throwing up all over the place
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
