That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
