We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
